The start of the school year is a time that is always full of anticipation and even anxiety. Who will my teachers be? Will I be in classes with friends? Have some of my friends changed over the summer? Will the work be too hard? For some children this anxiety will be so intense that they will resist going back to school. School avoidance is very important to identify and address quickly, as it can intensify and threaten development. Each day of school missed due to accommodating to a child’s anxiety makes a return to school more difficult and less likely. Days can easily become weeks and even months of missed school. A child who misses a substantial amount of school is inevitably going to face developmental delays: academic, social, behavioral and emotional. The pediatrician is often brought into these situations early, as when a child complains of vague physical symptoms that are keeping him or her from school or when a previously calm child becomes inconsolable about going to school in the mornings. With a thoughtful assessment of the potential causes of school avoidance, you can help almost all children return to school successfully.
School Refusal
Sustained school avoidance is now called “school refusal,” a term coined in the late 1990s to describe a school attendance problem driven by emotional distress, as opposed to truancy. It affects up to 15% of children (depending on the operational definition) and seems to peak in the earliest years of elementary school and again in early high school. These are not occasional absences, but missing over 80% of classroom time in a 2-week period. It is also marked by the presence of an anxiety disorder and the absence of conduct disorder. Often in such cases the parents are aware of their child’s whereabouts and motivated to return them to school. Youth with school refusal experience social and academic consequences in the short term and, over the long term, have shown problems with social, family, and professional performance, along with higher rates of major depressive disorder than is seen in the general population. Early identification of these children can make addressing the underlying distress and return to school much easier than attempts to treat after weeks or months out of school.
Dr. Susan D. Swick
Identifying the Problem
With younger children, school avoidance is most commonly associated with an anxious temperament or an underlying anxiety disorder, such as separation anxiety disorder or social phobia. A family history of anxiety may contribute or impact a parent’s approach to the issue. Children often present with vague somatic concerns that are genuine symptoms of anxiety (upset stomach, headache). A screening instrument such as the Screen for Child Anxiety Related Disorders (SCARED) can be helpful, but so is inquiring about sleep and other anxiety symptoms. Do the symptoms remit on weekends or in after-school hours? Are there other environmental factors that may be stressing younger children: Are they being teased or bullied at school? Are they struggling to find friends in a new classroom? Might they be having trouble with reading or other new tasks? Perhaps they are afraid of walking to school alone. Has there been a recent change or stress at home, such as a move or parental illness? Younger children may feel more anxious about separating from parents in the face of stress. But when parents accommodate a child’s wish to avoid school, the child’s anxiety, briefly relieved, grows more persistent, gets rewarded by parental attention, and reinforces their reluctance to try new things.
Dr. Michael S. Jellinek
Adolescents may be facing more complex challenges that lead to school avoidance. They may have an undiagnosed anxiety or mood disorder, perhaps complicated by substance abuse that is presenting as an inability to perform at school or to manage the challenge of keeping up with higher workloads. They may be facing complex situations with friends, bullying, or rejection. Those adolescents who are prone to procrastination may avoid school to manage their workload and their distress, which can then become tangled up with symptoms of anxiety and dysphoria. Missing school compounds this problem rather than solving it. Adolescents outside of the structure of school, hungry for socializing and new experiences, often turn to social media for entertainment. Days without exercise and nights without adequate sleep can make mood, attention, and anxiety symptoms worse while overdue work grows. Parents often fear that setting limits or “pushing” their stuck and miserable child may make them more depressed or even suicidal.
Accommodating the Problem Will Likely Make It Worse
It is worth noting that children with a genuine medical illness can also experience school avoidance. Temperamentally anxious children who stay home for several days with a febrile illness may find it overwhelming to return to school as they have become so comfortable at home. Adolescents may have fallen behind with work and find themselves unable to set a schedule and return to more structure. Youth who are managing a known mood or anxiety disorder often have low motivation or high anxiety and want to wait to feel entirely better before returning to school. Youth with a chronic condition such as severe allergies or a sustained viral infection may be anxious about managing symptoms at school. Their parents may have kept them home to be safe or until they feel better, unwittingly making the school avoidance worse.
Formulating a Management Plan
When you suspect school avoidance is present, the critical first step is to engage the parents alongside their child. Without their understanding of the nature of this behavior, it will continue. Start by acknowledging the real physical and emotional symptoms their child is experiencing; it is important that parents and patients not feel that they are being told this is “just” a psychological problem. Children rarely feign illness or manipulate; they genuinely feel bad enough to stay home. It is important that they understand this is a common problem that will get worse unless it is addressed directly. If you believe they are suffering from a mood or anxiety disorder, talk about treatment options and consider getting started with treatment while finding a therapist to participate in their care. Help everyone listen to the child or teenager to understand any realistic basis for anxiety and attempt to address it (e.g. address bullying, provide a tutor, support a parent dependent on the child, etc.)
You can partner with parents and the school to provide the child with structure and support to make the return to school manageable. Frame the challenge of “demagnetizing” home and “remagnetizing” school. When they are at home, there should be no screen time except to catch up or keep up with homework. The child should not be in bed all day unless he or she has a fever. There needs to be close attention paid to maintaining a regular routine, with bedtime and wake time, meals with family, and regular exercise. This may mean turning off the Wi-Fi while a child is at home and parents are at work and providing them with books.
Work with the school to make getting into school and staying there as easy as possible. If a child has very high distress or has been out of school for a long time, he or she may need to return gradually; perhaps aim for the child to spend an hour at school for the first few days and then gradually work up to half and full days. Younger children may benefit from having a “buddy” who meets them outside and enters school with them. This can help avoid intense emotional scenes with parents that heighten distress and lead to accommodation. The child can identify a preferred teacher (or librarian, coach, or school nurse). When they feel overwhelmed, they can have a “break” with that teacher to avoid leaving school altogether. If they enjoy sports, music, or art, emphasize these classes or practices as part of their return to school.
Remind parents and your patients that it is not a matter of making the distress better first and then returning to school. They can be in treatment for an illness and manage returning to school at the same time. Indeed, the distress around school will only get better by getting back to school. This is hard! Ask about previous challenges they have managed or mastered and remind them that this is no different. Providing parents with knowledge and support will help them to be validating of their children without accommodating their wish to avoid discomfort. This support of your patient and the parents is the first step in helping them manage a difficult period and stay on their healthiest developmental trajectory.
Dr. Swick is physician in chief at Ohana, Center for Child and Adolescent Behavioral Health, Community Hospital of the Monterey (Calif.) Peninsula. Dr. Jellinek is professor emeritus of psychiatry and pediatrics, Harvard Medical School, Boston. Email them at pdnews@mdedge.com.