Branches from the same tree
Around the same time that DownToDate began, Shivani Shah, DO, a pediatric neurology resident at Duke University, Durham, N.C., and her brother, Sagar Shah, an entrepreneur, had a similar idea.
At the time, Dr. Shah was a fourth-year medical student about to move from New Jersey to North Carolina. Friends who were internal medicine residents described the grueling reality of the early COVID pandemic.
“It was just horrible,” said Dr. Shah. “You were isolated from your family, your support system, everything. ... I think the pandemic really pushed us into realizing that this is a very important need, and sometimes it feels like community is lacking in the health care field.”
The sibling duo developed ForeverX, an app for health care workers to find meaningful and long-term romantic connections. It launched in 2021.
Concerned that the medical field was “siloed,” the Shahs chose to open the app to physicians, dentists, nurses, physical therapists, and other health care professionals. “Opening up the doors to more communication” between the health care branches was a priority.
To prevent catfishing, the app uses a twofold vetting system. Each user submits a photo of their driver’s license and a selfie that must match. There is also health care verification through an NPI number, nurse’s ID, or a manual process for those without either. None of the information is stored.
Through personal experience with dating apps, Dr. Shah hopes ForeverX can improve on some of their flaws, particularly the problem of matches being overly filtered by preferences. The “natural way” of meeting people is not filtered. And while most people have a dating checklist in mind, meeting someone face to face might send some of those prerequisites “out the window.”
“You can’t really put into words how you feel with someone ... the vibe,” Dr. Shah said. That is why her goal is to get people off the app and on an actual date IRL. “Something we’ve discussed internally is, how do we make this experience that’s virtual more human?”
She acknowledged that certain requirements, like a desire for children, might be crucial to some users. Many female doctors in their 30’s feel the “time crunch” of a ticking biological clock.
Optimize your date-ability
“I think people either love or hate dating apps, and I love them,” said Kevin Jubbal, MD. “I get to meet cool people and schedule dates from the comfort of my home.”
Dr. Jubbal, a former plastic surgery resident who left medicine to become an entrepreneur, is the founder of Med School Insiders, a tutoring and advising resource for premeds, medical students, and residents. His YouTube channel has more than 1.5 million subscribers, and he often receives questions about whether dating is feasible in medical school and how to balance a personal and academic/professional life.
Those who hate dating apps or receive few matches would do well to look inward instead of blaming the process, he said. It helps to view the experience as a learning tool that provides feedback very quickly.
“If you want to find a really amazing person, then you need to be what you want to find,” said Dr. Jubbal. “If you want to find someone who’s fit and intelligent and well read and well traveled, you need to be that. Otherwise, you’re probably not going to attract that person.”